Michael Jackson - The Lady in my Life
And so Tom concludes this look at Michael Jacksons epic volume of work with a song that is basically MJ declaring his love to a lamppost.
There'll be no darkness tonight Lady, our love will shine (Lighting the light) Just put your trust in my heart And meet me in paradise (Now is the time) Girl, you're every wonder in this world to me A treasure time won't steal way
What a beautiful way to start the beginning to the end of this, er, classic album. There will be no darkness tonight because the love between MJ and his lady friend (we'll let him have it his way, just this once) is doing what street lamps and the such like have done for years and that is cast the ugly disease of light pollution upon our landscape. Michael Jackson and his lamppost of a lady are then asking to put trust in their respective aortic pumps, which is a bit of an ask to make in my eyes. Jackson then asks for his ladypost to meet him in paradise (Neverland?). He then starts talking about treasure thus furthering the Peter Pan Neverland analogies and perhaps he is harbouring a want to be a Captain Hook style figure towards this lamppost of a lady.
So listen to my heart Lay your body close to mine Let me fill you with my dreams I can make you feel all right And, baby, through the years Gonna love you more each day So I promise you tonight That you'll always be the lady in my life
Michael Jackson wants his lady friend to listen to the consistent beat of his heart (can you envisage a more romantic sound than "THUD THUD, THUD THUD, THUD THUD" on a metronome timer?) and to lay their body close to his in a potentially hygienically compromising position. This is surely not going to do anyone any good - even though Michael Jackson claims he can make this tall girl feel alright, I feel that by swapping germs things can only get worse - and function over fashion and all that.
Jackson promises that through the years ahead (presumptuous isn't it? I mean I'm not a fan of Divorce by any means - more an advocate - but it's always a possibility surely?) he will love this lamppost more and more every day, which quite frankly is a sentence I never thought I'd write. But you cannot deny what the mans saying - he loves this lamppost too damn much for the likes of me to comprehend and well hey ho silver lining - I just find that utterly admirable.
Lay back in my tenderness Let's make this a night we won't forget Girl, I need your sweet caress Reach out to a fantasy Two hearts in the beat of ecstasy Come to me, girl
Michael Jackson would like to make this a night that he and his 'post will never forget - perhaps he will engage in the act of frottage and get some sexual pleasure from feeling her shiny steely outside, from the rough edges of the now slightly mouldy Lost Cat poster all the way up to the top end of the post with the brilliant, joyful light within. He needs to feel the sweet caressing touch of this object, which to me doesn't seem a very comfortable proposition at all - especially when you consider that this is the same lamppost that many canines have chosen to do their business on.
Michael Jackson however wants to keep on reaching out to this ludicrous fantasy of his that he can indulge in certain sensual, sexual acts with a lamppost without ever really providing a satisfactory description on how the mechanics of this might actually work. I mean with the language one assumes that he regards this post as being a feminine character, but then is the post, well, I don't want to use the phrase as this is a family website (unlike the very much non-family based television show This Morning which provides regular reviews on these objects, or non-family channel Dave which has adverts for them), but surely the post is a more phallic object than its feminine character implies?
And I will keep you warm Through the shadows of the night Let me touch you with my love I can make you feel so right
Michael Jackson will keep the subject of the song (allegedly a lamp post) warm during the night, through the shadows (which presumably the lamp post, if it were functioning correctly and not in the middle of this bizarre love situation, would prevent) of the night. Anyway Michael (presumably using a heater or something because he isn't exactly the warmest or indeed cuddliest of figures) will keep this post warm at night, which is just as well really as those posts do get awful cold.
Stay with me I want you to stay with me I need you by my side Don't you go nowhere Oh, babe Don't you go nowhere You're my lady All through the night
Michael Jackson would very much like this lady of his life to stay with him, which even if we do escape this lamppost fantasy for just a moment does sound somewhat like a fanatical statement to make with someone I am presuming he does not know very well. MJ needs this person to stay by his side or he may take drastic action, such as shooting her through the head or at the very least confining her to the realms of a small concrete room with nothing but a wooden bed and some rope for company.
Indeed the language here gets a bit more forceful and I'm not sure if this is kidnap, hostage (the same as the former but I digress), assault or indeed rape - but whatever, this is a somewhat sour note to end the album on and all I can say is that this is really a great shame.
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