Kate Nash - Mouthwash
This is my face, covered in freckles with an occasional spot and some veins. This is my body, covered in skin, and not all of it you can see And, this, is my mind, it goes over and over...
This is my face, covered in freckles with an occasional spot and some veins. This is my body, covered in skin, and not all of it you can see And, this, is my mind, it goes over and over the same old lines And, this, is my brain, it’s torturous analytical thoughts make me go insane
Kate Nash is talking about her face, which she alleges is covered with freckles (and she’s right on the marker here), a spot and some veins. It is clear that Kate Nash paid attention in the anatomy module of her Science GCSE (not A Level because let’s remember she went to a drama school where their idea of science is how they don’t want to appear in Star Trek), and for this she should be congratulated. Her body is also covered in skin (real A-Grade stuff here), although you cannot see all of it – because Kate Nash is not like those girls aloud (or some other generic pop act) and she’s better than them? Will you ever see her on Page 3? Happily, Video Killed The Radio Star predicts this to be an unlikely outcome.
Her mind goes over and over the same lines (Drama, do you see? She has to learn lines for her plays! Marvellous!), whilst the extensively tortuous thoughts going through her brain are making her go insane. One can sympathise with this brain issue, and she deserves all of our sorrow. She thinks, therefore she is mad. Oh, Ms. Nash. However can I help?
And I use mouthwash
Sometimes I floss
I got a family
And I drink lots of tea
It appears that Kate Nash uses mouthwash; she also flosses. Now, I’m not a dentistry student (and, contrary to popular belief, I’m not a dentist). But if I was I’m sure I would encourage this behaviour, and it’s good to see Kate Nash doing this. She also makes a bold and outlandish statement – she has a family. It is good to see that Ms. Nash has not encountered too many grievances, and I wish her no harm in this manner. She however is here making a mockery of people who unfortunately do not have families, and I would expect behaviour better than this. And, AND AND! She drinks cups of TEA! This is an astonishing development, for I always had Ms. Nash penned down as more of a Latte lass. I do wonder what Tea she actually drinks, for it would be nice to know that she drank PG Tips as opposed to the cack that Tescos sell as their own brand (disclaimer: this writer is not a fan of any Tea, but he is a fan of the various PG Tips advertising campaigns down the years and as such advocates it’s use as the basis for a warm beverage).
I’ve got nostalgic don’t know I’ve got familar faces I’ve got a mixed-up memory And I’ve got favourite places
She has apparently gotten Nostalgic lately. Which I mean we can all relate to, I for instance have started watching The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air again (right now Carlton is receiving an epiphany at the hands of Tom Jones and why happiness isn’t ace – before breaking into a joint rendition of it’s not unusual. A classic formula). Kate Nash also has familiar faces – like the rest of us! She has a mixed up memory - like the rest of us! And, oh dear lord and, she has some favourite places – like the rest of us! In conclusion, whilst some might say she is trying to come across as ordinary, here she comes across as being so ordinary, so fantastically mundane to make her abnormally ordinary – so really she is just trying to say she’s better than everyone else because she’s so everywoman).
And I’m sitting at home on a Friday night
And I’m sitting at home on a Friday night and I hope everything’s going to be alright
Kate Nash is sitting at home on a Friday night, presumably enjoying the stellar lineup of entertainment that the range of channels across the BBC usually provides – tonight for instance they have a Children in Need special going, which is always worth the watch. Who knows, she might even be performing on it – which would make her a liar in this case. She also hopes that everything will be alright – and, even though I know there’s Jonathan Ross on tonight (and lets face it, a major BBC event without Jonathan Ross? The sheer absurdity of it means surely he will be there at some point), one assumes that she will be able to cope and that things will indeed be alright.
This is my face, I’ve got a thousand opinions and not the time to explain
And this is my body, and no matter how you try and disable it, I’ll still be
here
And, this, is my mind, and although you try to infringe you cannot confine
And, this, is my brain, and even if you try and hold me back there’s nothing
that you can gain
Kate Nash claims that she has a thousand opinions (something that would put her in league with Simon Cowell or Jeremy Clarkson) but not the time to explain it – if her opinions are anything like Clarksons, then all she would surely need to do is write a bestselling book (or equally sign up for a column in The Sunday Times) and then she would be able to express these opinions. Mind you, you don’t exactly get Grumpy Young Women getting the ratings these days, so I doubt she’d be able to appear on a show of that nature. Nash also claims that we are out to “get” her by disabling her body, a comment that is far from the truth and which I really find to be in quite bad taste. She also declares that whatever the world tries, we cannot confine her mind (and I mean really are we trying to confine her? I just encouraged her to write a column in a bestselling weekly broadsheet!). And in a final note of heed, she scares the nation by declaring that by holding her back there is nothing we can gain – but then again, apart from changing the radio station every now and again, what do we have to lose by letting her have her say?
I might go and have that cup of tea now.
Either this entry was before the 2009 edition or comments just aren't active, sorry. If you want to get in touch please contact us!
« Britney Spears - Gimme || Benny Benassi - Satisfaction [Video] »
