Party Bingo Advertisement
Well it seems here we have a group of ladies asking for various items. I am not entirely sure who is asking the question and what the exact question is at this point. The first woman asks for diamonds,...
Well it seems here we have a group of ladies asking for various items. I am not entirely sure who is asking the question and what the exact question is at this point. The first woman asks for diamonds, a fairly stereotypical female response. The next asks for a Lobster Thermador, although judging by her figure that may not come as a shock to some. After this an elderly woman asks for a man who’s not sissy-ish, which goes to show that some women never properly outgrow the need for a man who lacks sensitivity and intends to wow them with their manly ways (Damn! And I was banking on that being a myth).
So it’s quite clear to tell now that the women have been asked what they would most like, although I’m still not sure who’s asking the question and what the parameters are to this question. I mean there has to be a limit to what you can have and the first few requests haven’t been too unreasonable so far. However, this illusion is shattered when one of the interviewee’s requests the ability to grow wings and go flying, so reality is quickly crashing down around our shoulders now. The next lady asks for something that can’t really be given to her as she wants to climb the highest mountain, and as far as I know there aren’t Red Letter Days to Everest as of yet, and I don’t know if paragliding is recommended or ever possible at that kind of altitude (without freezing to death on the way down).
Now a bit of humor takes place as the next interviewee asks for a little more height as she looks like she’s currently pushing 4ft10, so much so her head only just reaches above the barrier at the mall and those things aren’t that high (well considering I measure a good 5ft11 or so). The next woman asks for a cure for snoring, and I wonder if she means that as she is a snorer herself or her partner snores. This isn’t made clear but if she took the time to visit her GP she’d probably find that there are methods to stop snoring so that shouldn’t really be one of her biggest desires in life.
Next in a moment of irony, the taller woman with the lady who asked to be taller says she would like to be a little shorter, and I’m sure everyone is rolling in the aisles now. What could be next though, as most of these desires have been a little bit self-absorbed, regarding appearance and outlandish dreams of thrill seeking? Come on, where’s the cure for cancer; the world peace; the end of racism etc? The next request takes the biscuit too, as the woman claims she doesn’t want yellow gold (gold is not yellow! That’s why it’s called gold!!!), no rather she would prefer white gold!? In spite of the fact it would no longer be gold, no in fact it would be white instead (not dissimilar to that Blackadder episode where Percy makes green in a botched alchemy experiment) so it would lose all its value.
Suddenly, the advert starts to get to the point of its pitch and explains the context a little. Finally, as I was wondering who could fulfill these lavish, and on the border of ridiculous, wishes. The advert chimes in with “it’s what women want” and we see a laptop appear with a tacky pink website on display. It seems this whole time this has been an advert for online bingo…
If there are prizes for missing the point, or misleading the public then this ad takes the crown. Not only do they dismiss all the demands of what women want (I mean the clever ad writer would try at least a vague link to bingo rather than all this crap about wanting to grow wings); they insist that women want online bingo. Now I’m sure of all of man’s achievements including modern medicine, genetic engineering, huge cities, motorized transport, ethical and humane civilizations and the mastery of the skies, bingo is one of the top achievements of all time. I mean everyone would miss it so much if it wasn’t there wouldn’t they? Of course I am being sarcastic as I think it’s a bit stupid of an advert to claim that “it’s what women want” as I have a feeling women (or men for that matter) could live without bingo. And of course being a man I know for certain that women don’t know what they want anyway. Also, does Party Bingo promise to fulfill any of the wishes these women that these actual women have? No also, as bingo can’t really award a set of wings as a prize, or white gold for that matter and did one of the women mention they wanted bingo more than anything?
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